Hey, Dick! It's Mike Duffy
December 18, 2013 4:19 PM   Subscribe

 
But...why

Because...

OK
posted by Hoopo at 4:28 PM on December 18, 2013


Rarely have I been more grateful to have a somewhat unusual name.
posted by The Card Cheat at 4:28 PM on December 18, 2013


So he's an ex-journo and suspended (and apparently dodgy) conservative Canadian Senator... but why is he doing this?
posted by Mezentian at 4:29 PM on December 18, 2013


is this art, this might be art
posted by PinkMoose at 4:31 PM on December 18, 2013 [10 favorites]


This is some sort of weirdo Google Labs project, right?
posted by jquinby at 4:31 PM on December 18, 2013


You know... what I really want now is a Rob Ford version of this.
Preferably it he's off his tits on booze and coke and angry.
So very angry.
posted by Mezentian at 4:33 PM on December 18, 2013 [4 favorites]


Of all the people in the world to do this...

Seriously, why couldn't Ryan Gosling have done this? Or Patrick Stewart? Or...anyone else?
posted by Elly Vortex at 4:37 PM on December 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


I got curious and looked for an explanation. Real quick - these are just the opening seconds of a fundraising video that got sent out - they'd slap the right name on at the beginning, and then they'd all segue into the same video about how awesome Stephen Harper is. Someone else recently noticed all those videos are still online, and the made their own site that just had the names.

I'm amused that they actually mis-spell my first name.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:40 PM on December 18, 2013 [7 favorites]


I found it mildly entertaining the way he would sometimes get kind of jocular when the name was an old-fashioned male name. "Hey, Lester, it's the ooold Duff."
posted by diamondsky at 4:40 PM on December 18, 2013 [2 favorites]


Seriously, why couldn't Ryan Gosling have done this? Or Patrick Stewart? Or...anyone else?

"Hi Elly Vortex, it's Pauly Shore..."
posted by 256 at 4:40 PM on December 18, 2013 [3 favorites]


I'm assuming Ryan and Patrick have jobs. Mike Duffy seems to be a bit unemployed. Maybe he's bored?
posted by Mezentian at 4:41 PM on December 18, 2013


"Hi Elly Vortex, it's Pauly Shore..."

"hey, buuuddy!"
posted by Elly Vortex at 4:42 PM on December 18, 2013 [3 favorites]


I think he likes Gregg more than Greg.
posted by Mezentian at 4:45 PM on December 18, 2013


Here's one of the actual fundraising videos for y'all.
posted by doublesix at 4:55 PM on December 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


Nigel

Knowing that this was the intro to a plea for money makes it all the better.
posted by [expletive deleted] at 5:00 PM on December 18, 2013 [2 favorites]


I found it mildly entertaining the way he would sometimes get kind of jocular when the name was an old-fashioned male name. "Hey, Lester, it's the ooold Duff."

I got that with my name. "It's the Old Duff!".
posted by Redfield at 5:08 PM on December 18, 2013


He's trying to establish that he is a neighbor to every single Canadian for senatorial living expenses..
posted by benzenedream at 5:17 PM on December 18, 2013 [7 favorites]


No White Person Left Ungreeted
posted by threeants at 5:26 PM on December 18, 2013 [9 favorites]


I requested Mulva.
posted by jimmythefish at 5:52 PM on December 18, 2013 [3 favorites]


The deal is this: Mike Duffy did this a couple of years ago as part of a Conservative fundraising campaign.

However, even though he's been in hot water for the past six months (at least), this campaign was still live on the Conservative website.

So, some dude in Ottawa (I think) discovered this Internet gem, and created this website before the Cons could take it down.

Hi Rob! Hi Doug!
posted by KokuRyu at 6:28 PM on December 18, 2013 [3 favorites]


I requested Suckers.
posted by islander at 6:30 PM on December 18, 2013 [2 favorites]


I think he likes Gregg more than Greg

In this case, I'm okay with that.
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:31 PM on December 18, 2013


Why was that so creepy?
posted by maryr at 6:39 PM on December 18, 2013


There's no Bort. I requested Bort.
posted by codacorolla at 6:39 PM on December 18, 2013 [2 favorites]


Looking good, Billy Ray!

Feeling good, Louis!
posted by maryr at 6:43 PM on December 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


Oddly, despite distinguishing between Kerry and Kerri, and Lee and Leigh, and even Jeffrey and Jeffery, he uses identical clips for Jeff and Geoff, and puts in Alan while presumably allowing all the Allans, Alens and Allens to be overlooked. I trust the RCMP is on this.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 6:51 PM on December 18, 2013


Hey, Duffy, I told you I don't go by Wendell anymore!

That's better.

You know, on those little name-tag license plate things they sell in card shops, I often could not find EITHER name. So this was quite a project... and mind-numbing, which may explain a lot about Mike Duffy's activities since then.
posted by oneswellfoop at 6:55 PM on December 18, 2013


Is he "the oooooold Duff" to anyone but Christine?
posted by maryr at 7:23 PM on December 18, 2013


Oh! Charlie! Charlie is also acquainted with "the old Duff"!
posted by maryr at 7:25 PM on December 18, 2013


And Hal!

Sorry, stopping now.
posted by maryr at 7:26 PM on December 18, 2013


He is also "the old Duff" to Wendy.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:36 PM on December 18, 2013


For "Susan," he actually says "Suzanne." (I find this endlessly entertaining. I will probably see them all before I go to bed tonight.)
posted by neroli at 7:38 PM on December 18, 2013


I can't get enough of this wonderful Duff.
posted by Mezentian at 7:41 PM on December 18, 2013 [5 favorites]


I lied, I am not stopping, I am figuring out how many coworkers I can creep out tomorrow.

Anyway, they were not very efficient when recording these - there are tons of homonyms recorded twice, besides the aforementioned Greg and Gregg! pairing. I can't stop finding them. In no real order (and I'm too lazy to link every bloody pair of these, sorry):
  • Ray and Rae
  • Geoff and Jeff (might be same clip)
  • Lori and Lorie
  • Jeffrey and Jeffery
  • Earl and Earle? (might be the same clip)
  • Randal and Randall
  • Judi and Judy
  • Alana and Alanna
  • Alison and Allison
  • Michael and Micheal
  • Cara and Kara
  • Beverley and Beverly
  • Corey and Cory
  • Derrel and his brother Darrell and their friend Daryl and his brother Darryl
  • Terrence and Terrance? (might be same clip)
  • Linda and Lynda
  • Kristy and Christy (DEFINITELY THE SAME CLIP! SOMEONE CHECKED. AMAZING.)
  • Devin and Devon
  • Diana and Dianna
  • Debra and Deborah and Debora
  • Fay and Faye
  • Both Darr(i/e)ns
  • Megan and Meghan
  • Neil and Neal
  • Gale and Gayle
  • Gerry ("my man!") and Jerry
  • Sharon and Sharron
  • Shaun and Shawn (but no Sean)
  • Shauna and Shawna
  • Stacey and Stacy
  • Toni and Tony
  • Terri and Terry
  • Tracy and Tracey OK, you know what, this isn't fun anymore. For fuck's sake, if you're going to record all these, why don't you check some. Many are directly adjacent in alphabetical order. C'mon, Duffy, get it together. I just realized - tragically, the one man he cannot greet... is himself. (Also, Denis's message est en francais.)
posted by maryr at 8:19 PM on December 18, 2013 [4 favorites]


This makes me sad that the younger generation doesn't turn out at the polls.

"Madison, hi! It's the ole Duff here."
"Hi Jaiden! It's Mike Duffy.
"Kaylee, it's the ole Duff!"
"Kaileigh! It's Mike Duffy here."
"Hi Quaiylih! Mike Duffy here."
posted by threeants at 8:39 PM on December 18, 2013 [6 favorites]


I want this in 3d. Or maybe hologram form.

Do you think we could make Siri into Duffy?
posted by cacofonie at 9:08 PM on December 18, 2013


Also, why does he pronounce "roger" as Rojjaayy!
posted by cacofonie at 9:11 PM on December 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


I am fascinated by the way he appears, disappears, changes size and tosses things about with wee sound effects in the fund raising video every single time I play it.

I feel a little like Simple Dog right now. "I made Duff! I'm M*A*G*I*C*A*L!"
posted by maudlin at 9:43 PM on December 18, 2013 [1 favorite]


This is like a Canadian Disneyland gift shop!
posted by mazola at 9:43 PM on December 18, 2013


Derrel and his brother Darrell and their friend Daryl and his brother Darryl

No Da-rill?
posted by Sys Rq at 10:38 PM on December 18, 2013


Gerry ("my man!")

Take that, Geraldine!
posted by Sys Rq at 10:46 PM on December 18, 2013


My given name is "Duff," and I have been known to go by "Duffy." There is no greeting for me. :(
posted by 256 at 4:42 AM on December 19, 2013


OK, everyone I know who is on this list is getting a greeting from the old Duff
posted by stargell at 5:20 AM on December 19, 2013


I was wondering if he and Rob Ford are still on speaking terms.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 5:37 AM on December 19, 2013


You can tell he is a conservative by how he pronounces Guy. It's not like he could ever get funds from a Frenchman anyway.
posted by srboisvert at 6:13 AM on December 19, 2013


It's not like he could ever get funds from a Frenchman anyway.

Not that he's above trying though.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 7:04 AM on December 19, 2013


Welp, I'm off to Duffy everyone I know. Thanks folks!
posted by gohabsgo at 8:05 AM on December 19, 2013


Some new names just got posted.

Highlights include seasonal favorite Klaus and the interminable pause before Margot.
posted by Copronymus at 8:05 AM on December 19, 2013


I found the Chuck Norris easter egg. Any others?
posted by maudlin at 8:18 AM on December 19, 2013


Heh. Clint and friend make it in, too.
posted by maudlin at 8:20 AM on December 19, 2013


Also, why does he pronounce "roger" as Rojjaayy!

I assume he thinks it's aux Francais. Though then you'd think he'd say "Bonjour, Roger!"
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:58 AM on December 19, 2013


Also, why does he pronounce "roger" as Rojjaayy!

People keep clicking this looking for a Rogering.
posted by The 10th Regiment of Foot at 9:13 AM on December 19, 2013


hey he mispronounced Blake and A-A- ron, at least if key and peele have anything to say about it
posted by OHenryPacey at 9:48 AM on December 19, 2013


Sometimes I wonder why I even bother like reading books or going to museums when this can take up so much of my time.

But I am a little concerned that he says "Hello Name, Mike Duffy again!" to me. WHEN IN GODS NAME WAS THERE A FIRST TIME, MIKE?!?!?
posted by Grandysaur at 5:00 PM on December 19, 2013


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