“You like long things, don’t you, Chi-Chan?”

April 6, 2018 11:36 PM

A series of commercials for Sakeru Gum. (“Coverage” on The Verge and SBNation.)
posted by Going To Maine (30 comments total)

Considering it's a series of gum commercials, that plot line is almost worthy of Shakespearu.
posted by fairmettle at 11:58 PM on April 6, 2018 [9 favorites]

The final twist was something I really did not expect... especially from advertising. I can't imagine it surviving a meeting in an American ad agency. But then, when is the last time a series of American commercials had an ongoing storyline over 10-12 short spots? And not just ongoing spokescharacters like Mister Whipple or Madge the Manicurist; I mean a story with a beginning, middle and end. I vaguely remember an evolving romance between two Tasters Choice Coffee drinkers decades ago, but that story was an obvious straight line...
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:02 AM on April 7, 2018 [4 favorites]

That was a wacky business indeed.

I vaguely remember an evolving romance between two Tasters Choice Coffee drinkers decades ago, but that story was an obvious straight line...

Ah, yes. The gentleman of the couple was none other than a young Rupert Giles, doing one of those Amurrakinn accents that British folks do.
posted by Ursula Hitler at 12:42 AM on April 7, 2018 [1 favorite]

Wait am I to understand she’s not actually dying?
posted by aubilenon at 1:17 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

Huh... wow... that is a pretty massive plot twist at the end.
posted by Nanukthedog at 5:03 AM on April 7, 2018

"The final twist was something I really did not expect... especially from advertising. I can't imagine it surviving a meeting in an American ad agency."

TBH, I'm kind of surprised it passed there, too. I can only assume that the rich Japanese history of exceptionally-bizarre advertisements across the board led to the company seeing it as *just* a plot twist for the gag rather than a broader statement.
posted by mystyk at 5:35 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

Lo-ong, lo-ong, ma-a-a-aaaaaan!!!
posted by xingcat at 5:37 AM on April 7, 2018 [8 favorites]

> But then, when is the last time a series of American commercials had an ongoing storyline over 10-12 short spots? And not just ongoing spokescharacters like Mister Whipple or Madge the Manicurist; I mean a story with a beginning, middle and end.

Dan and Dave
posted by ardgedee at 5:58 AM on April 7, 2018

Wow. Can't wait to see the campaign for Sakeru's new Long and Thick Gummy.
posted by Thorzdad at 5:59 AM on April 7, 2018

Wait am I to understand she’s not actually dying?

I think the subsequent castigation by her friend implies it was a ruse, but that might be reading too much into the translation.
posted by Mister Cheese at 6:00 AM on April 7, 2018 [1 favorite]

Is this a gum or is it a gummy? The Japanese commercials uniformly call it a "gummy", the American honkies writing their hot takes on it are uniformly calling it "gum".
posted by ardgedee at 6:01 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

It’s a gummy and I’m pretty sure sakeru is “to split” and not the name of the brand
posted by thedaniel at 6:01 AM on April 7, 2018 [1 favorite]

It’s a gummy. The translation messes up a couple times (including in the video title). They’re pretty utilitarian in the brand name, yeah. “Gummies that you tear apart.”

Honestly, they’re pretty bad, too. But these commercials are outstanding.
posted by DoctorFedora at 6:02 AM on April 7, 2018 [3 favorites]

Top 10 adime betrayals
posted by the painkiller at 6:09 AM on April 7, 2018 [1 favorite]

Mr. LockIsLit is convinced that the Loooong Loooooooooooong Maaaaaan bit is a riff on an American song. Any clues?
posted by Nancy_LockIsLit_Palmer at 6:30 AM on April 7, 2018

Not sure about the vocals, but the saxophone and backing rhythm sounds like a pastiche of Careless Whisper to me?
posted by Nutri-Matic Drinks Synthesizer at 6:49 AM on April 7, 2018 [1 favorite]

I guess Long Long Man only slept with Chi-Chan in order to get closer to the dude. The flashback didn't clarify.
posted by paper chromatographologist at 6:57 AM on April 7, 2018

It's about their penises. I just thought I'd put that out there.
posted by dis_integration at 7:13 AM on April 7, 2018 [12 favorites]

Not sure about the vocals, but the saxophone and backing rhythm sounds like a pastiche of Careless Whisper yt to me?

Better known to millennials as Sexy Sax Man.
posted by dobbs at 7:37 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

This lead me to another series of Japanese commercials for a funky car.
posted by kmkrebs at 9:27 AM on April 7, 2018 [3 favorites]

Oh. My. God. I'm quitting the internet. I really can't imagine that this isn't the Pinnacle. I'm calling it. All downhill from here folks.
posted by chasles at 9:39 AM on April 7, 2018 [3 favorites]

I REALLY want a Daihatsu Wake now. Why can't them sell them in Canada? :(
posted by Nutri-Matic Drinks Synthesizer at 10:12 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

I’ve never been happier to watch 6 minutes straight of commercials.
posted by gryphonlover at 10:13 AM on April 7, 2018 [7 favorites]

Ulysses, Great Expectations, The Odyssey, Infinite Jest, Go Tell It On The Mountain, the Bible... No.

The greatest epic ever told was this series of Japanese gummy commercials.
posted by AlSweigart at 10:25 AM on April 7, 2018 [4 favorites]

Fantastic! I never thought I’d find myself describing something as the “Trapped in the Closet of Japanese commercials” to someone, and I thank the world for this.
posted by orbit-3 at 11:46 AM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

Well, I wasn't expecting to stop what I was doing, sit down and tell everyone to hush while I finish when I clicked the link but here we are.
posted by dozo at 12:30 PM on April 7, 2018

I don’t think Long Long Man actually slept with the woman. I think that was just the guy’s imagination.

Also, they really are just a wretched candy. Like eating one of those erasers that just smudges your pencil marks around instead of actually erasing them.
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:39 PM on April 7, 2018 [2 favorites]

I was waiting out my timeline to be able to post this. Isn't it great? I laughed and laughed. Every possible stereotype, sexist and otherwise. Beautifully done.
posted by MovableBookLady at 3:57 PM on April 7, 2018

It's going to be fun explaining this when I inevitably break out into "Long loooong maaaaan" when I see a long thing.
posted by rodlymight at 9:45 AM on April 8, 2018 [2 favorites]

The "plot twist" is just another romance trope, only it's one you see in BL. The quintessential conversation in this trope is

Man 1: Stay away from my sister! I won't let you date her, she's precious to me!
Man 2: I'm not in love with your sister... I'm in love with YOU!

Or substitute it with perceived jealousy over a girlfriend, or daughter, or some other woman in a straight man's life.

There is a Thai lip balm commercial that also parodies this trope:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCjOd5InIhc
posted by picklenickle at 12:14 PM on April 8, 2018