ASMR For White Liberals

April 6, 2019 9:40 AM

"You're one of the good ones... all the black people at your job love you." [SLYT]
posted by nightrecordings (25 comments total)

This is the best thing I've seen on the internet in weeks. I stumbled across it maybe last week, shared it around, and then...didn't think of Metafilter? Why do I never think to post good stuff like this here?

Anyway. So good. It's painful 'cause it's true.
posted by scaryblackdeath at 10:35 AM on April 6, 2019 [1 favorite]

I've said this as a joke to my friends in private and even came up with my own dialogue - never occurred to me to make a Youtube video out of it. I am so glad this is made lol.
posted by yueliang at 10:45 AM on April 6, 2019 [3 favorites]

Hilarious in an uncomfortably amusing way!
posted by madamjujujive at 11:04 AM on April 6, 2019 [8 favorites]

I feel personally attacked
posted by escape from the potato planet at 11:21 AM on April 6, 2019 [3 favorites]

I busted out laughing about the hair.
posted by droplet at 11:35 AM on April 6, 2019 [4 favorites]

Also by Randall Otis: Republican Pick Up Lines
posted by otherchaz at 11:46 AM on April 6, 2019 [4 favorites]

[*BLACK HAIR*]

This is one of those things that, now that it exists, I'm surprised that it didn't already exist.
I'm also surprised that it's not like a whole industry. Seriously, this guy could make a quick buck just doing this for 5 minutes a week and slapping a sock+mattress commercial on it.

Anyway, very funny, and less disturbing than mukbang.
posted by lkc at 11:48 AM on April 6, 2019 [2 favorites]

I both laughed and felt bad about myself, so that was an interesting experience.
posted by jacquilynne at 11:50 AM on April 6, 2019 [8 favorites]

This is like the 2019 version of Black People Love Us.
posted by fuse theorem at 11:50 AM on April 6, 2019 [14 favorites]

I love ASMR videos and this is the greatest thing in the history of things.
posted by MillMan at 11:51 AM on April 6, 2019 [1 favorite]

This is like the 2019 version of Black People Love Us.

Also notable as one of Chelsea Peretti's first projects.
posted by lkc at 11:53 AM on April 6, 2019 [8 favorites]

BLACK HAIR ON MICROPHONE
posted by doctornemo at 12:08 PM on April 6, 2019 [3 favorites]

Black People Love Us

Holy shit; that's something I haven't thought about in years.

The web used to be a much smaller place, and yet – compared to the handful of TV and radio stations that were available in any given town – it seemed incomprehensibly vast at the time. And sites as simple as Black People Love Us – made by individuals, and unrestrained by the risk aversion of traditional media – seemed revolutionary.

I feel lucky to have come of age with the internet. Those born before (often) missed learning the cultural language that makes its more fascinating corners intelligible. Those born after can't understand what the world was like without it.
posted by escape from the potato planet at 12:10 PM on April 6, 2019 [20 favorites]

*drags wispy hair across microphone*
yes, it's thinning. it's okay that you asked
*switches to other microphone*
i went to an ivy but i never talk about it
posted by phooky at 12:16 PM on April 6, 2019 [2 favorites]

Love Me Love Me Love Me...
posted by Jessica Savitch's Coke Spoon at 1:21 PM on April 6, 2019 [1 favorite]

Shortcut for people like me who are Not With It: ASMR
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 2:39 PM on April 6, 2019 [2 favorites]

Also notable as one of Chelsea Peretti's first projects.

I can’t figure out if this is a joke about Get Out or if it’s true.
posted by pxe2000 at 5:04 PM on April 6, 2019 [1 favorite]

It's true. She's own the front page as the white friend who doesn't get it.
posted by kenko at 5:36 PM on April 6, 2019 [2 favorites]

The subtitles make this video excellent regardless of its other very great merits.
posted by Fukiyama at 7:33 PM on April 6, 2019 [1 favorite]

This is very effective satire.
posted by Middlemarch at 8:25 PM on April 6, 2019

So when he said the "black hair" thing I thought, but... what about my boyfriend! when I was 16! and then the next thing he said was "so you had sex with a black person, that means you can't be racist" and I was like, uh oh.
posted by Daily Alice at 9:22 PM on April 6, 2019 [9 favorites]

Yaaaas Queen. Yas. Queen.
posted by Ms. Moonlight at 2:49 AM on April 7, 2019 [1 favorite]

So funny! What does it say about me that I did sort of get ASMR from this? (I never do from intentional videos. Maybe my brain was like, "Sarcasm detected. Video not intentional. You may proceed with your ASMR").
posted by marimeko at 9:57 AM on April 7, 2019

I was promised a trophy.
posted by krisjohn at 11:44 PM on April 7, 2019 [1 favorite]

Haha the hair thing! So funny.
posted by blueheels at 8:45 AM on April 8, 2019