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Amphibia: Taking Charge
After introducing the Plantars to her favorite show, "Suspicion Island," the mysteriously bottomless battery of Anne's cell phone finally gives out, and she and the Plantars go to find a way to charge it. As a result they almost die.
Amphibia: The Domino Effect
Anne misses her cat Domino from back home, but finds a caterpillar in the woods who looks a lot like her and decides to keep it as a pet, against Hop Pop's rules. As a result they almost die.
Amphibia: Stakeout
Anne and Hop Pop are arguing, so Sprig hides Hop Pop's prize-winning corn and suggests they watch the field overnight in a misguided ploy to bring them closer together. As a result he and Polly almost die.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Emergency Medical Services
This week: still in the void, for (perhaps) four more weeks.
A crisis is developing over the fate of translators in
Afghanistan, who are experiencing difficulties in obtaining
visas to enter the US as troops withdraw, a life-or-death
situation for them. And Now: Jim Cramer Loves Chipotle. Main
story (22 minutes): about ambulence service in the US, often staffed by the underpaid, and yet are still frequently extremely expensive.
Amphibia: Hop Luck
The town's annual pot luck competition is coming, and every year Hop Pop's cooking earns the family a night in the Shame Cage, but Anne thinks she can help the family win by making pizza. As a result they almost die.
Amphibia: Flood, Sweat & Tears
The basement, Anne's room, is flooded. Hop Pop offers to let Anne sleep on the couch, but Sprig has a better idea: they could be roommates until the basement drains. As a result they almost die again.
Amphibia: Cane Crazy
Anne, Sprig and Polly break Hop Pop's favorite cane, which has been passed down in the Plantar family for centuries. They go out to get wood for another from a "doom tree." As a result they almost die again.
Amphibia: Best Fronds
The Planters are still mistrustful of Anne. She's feeling homesick, so Sprig takes her to his favorite pond, against the advice and efforts of Hop Pop. As a result they almost die again.
Amphibia: Anne or Beast?
In a land of sentient amphibians and their many predators, vagrant One-Eyed Wally runs into the town of Wartwood claiming to have seen a monster. Young frog Sprig Plantar disobeys his grandfather to go look it, but it's not a beast at all: it's 13-year-old Anne Boonchuy, a human from another world.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: SAN FRANCISCO INTERNATIONAL
Re-rewatch! (wait, really?) A fairly bog-standard pilot for a TV show from 1970, about the people and events at a major airport. This one did make it to series, but with an almost entirely different cast. File this under Seventies-tastic. This is the third time MST Club has done this one, since it somehow made it into the best-of poll we did a few years back. Previously and again.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Housing Discrimination
This week: another show from the void, but maybe not for much longer! The Tokyo Olympics proceed despite a spike in COVID cases, and the UK prepares to lift nearly all restrictions despite an uptick in cases over there. And Now: People On TV Mean "Fucking" (Olympics Edition). Main story (32 minutes): Housing Discrimination, its legacy in the US, how its effects are felt today, and what can be done to rectify it.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SINISTER URGE
Rewatch! Ed Wood is the only one who can teach us about the dangers, the EVILS of pornography. Because Ed Wood is so pure and noble in that regard. Also there's a short, Keeping Clean and Neat, to teach kids about hygiene, so gather 'round kids, rather 'round the laptop! Previously.
THINKING - PRINTING - THINKING - PRINTING
Want to make greeting cards and signs from your very own computer like you would have in 1986? theprintshop.club emulates an Apple II running Broderbund's original release of The Print Shop in your browser, and when it prints out, generates a PDF you can then send to your printer!
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE STARFIGHTERS
Re-rewatch! Soar along at Mach 2 in one of the most notoriously dangerous aircraft ever made! Basically a promotional piece for the US Air Force and the F-104 Starfighter jet, we follow the brain-killing career of a bright young pilot tragically burdened with the fate of being played by Bob Dornan, as he fights his Congressman father's rather reasonable wishes that he be transferred to a job where he doesn't put his life on the line frequently through the act of just flying an airplane. Come for the copious in-flight refueling, stay for the poopie suit party! A difficult movie, but great to watch subjected to the attentions of a spaceborne guy and his automated mocking devices. Previously and again. Also, this movie has an entire post on the blue about it.
Camera manipulation is ironically still important
Is it possible to complete Super Mario 64 blindfolded? Not only is it possible, it's a speedrun category, as recently demonstrated by Bubzia at SGDQ 2021.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: LAST OF THE WILD HORSES
Rewatch! A cowboy is framed for murder, although judging by most westerns, everyone is killing everyone else constantly, so why would anyone ever have to be framed for it? This was MST3K's final Robert Lippert-produced movie, and last Albert Glasser-scored one. This is also the episode where mirror-universe Dr. F and Frank riff the film for the first segment. Previously.
The world's first 1541 disk drive graphics demo
Matthias Kramm, a demo coder, shows us his setup: a Commodore 64, a monitor, and a 1541 disk drive, all connected together. He show us he's loaded a small program into the drive's memory. Then, he disconnects the computer from the monitor and the drive, severs and strips the drive's cable still plugged into the drive, connects them directly to the monitor with a resistor spliced in, opens and closes the drive's door, and the show begins. The fact that the demo has music without speakers isn't close to the most impressive part of it. There's an overview on his site, which has links to more details.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE VIOLENT YEARS
Rewatch! Some young women go on a rampage directed by Ed Wood. There's also a short, Young Man's Fancy, about a girl with "squishy" feelings making a dinner, but is actually about how great General Electric appliances are. This is the episode with the "Turn you crank to Frank!" radio station jokes, which were a riff on Minneapolis country station WBOB, their slogan: "Turn your knob to BOB!" A fun episode in general. Previously.
The Six Degrees of Ryu
Six Degrees of Ryu is a Twitter account that, in the manner of Erdos numbers and the old Kevin Bacon game long discussed on the internet (and automated through the still-functioning Oracle of Bacon), counts the number of video game connections it takes to get from various characters to Ryu from Street Fighter. Pepsiman, Slenderman, and EVA Unit 01 all have Ryu numbers of 3. Jesus Christ, Joe Biden, and Snoop Dogg have Ryu Numbers of 2. Because of Scribblenauts, many historical figures, including George Washington Carver and Thomas Edison, have Ryu Numbers of 4. Deadmau5 has a Ryu Number of 7. (Previously, in 2001 and 2012)
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Health Care Sharing Ministries
Another episode from the white void, will it be with us much longer? Senate Republicans rejecting a voting rights act, because awful. Republicans continue to push wildly incorrect voter fraud claims, including something stupidly called ItalyGate. And Now: On The Occasion Of His Departure From C-SPAN, One Last Salute To The Most Patient Man On Television. Main story (23 minutes): Health Care Sharing Ministries are a way that some use to get out of the penalties for not having health insurance in the US. But they are not insurance, are much less regulated, and in some places like Florida are crazy easy to set up. So easy that LWT did just that, in Florida, spinning off their old church Our Lady Of Perpetual Exemption, called Our Lady Of Perpetual Health, and their new "plan," JohnnyCare, to demonstrate how little health care an HCSM can get away with. Features the return of "Wanda Jo Oliver," John's "Mega Wife," (aka Rachel Dranch).
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE SKYDIVERS
Re-rewatch! Coleman Francis wrote and directed three movies and MST3K did them all. It's telling that he made three films that he poured his sweat and soul into--and that all three are barely watchable, and among the worst of all movies. Bring lots of coffee! Also has the short Why Study Industrial Arts, so also bring along lots of fresh sawdust. Previously and again.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: PACE Loans
Another entry from the void. Biden holds a summit with that notorious jokester, Vladimir Putin. Japan is set to host the Olympics in 2021, making up for their not being held in 2020, but still against the advice of many considering their vaccination rate is just 6%. Shown is a Japanese condom commercial with an anime styling. And Now: Please Enjoy Some Better Names For The Dogs From This Year's Westminster Dog Show. Main Story (22m): PACE loans, intended as a way for people to cheaply renovate houses for energy savings, are sometimes handed out by predatory contractors to people unaware of their costs and consequences, resulting in them losing their homes. And Now: The Winner Of Best In Show At The Westminster Dog Show Breaks Newscasters' Brains.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Prison Heat
From the white void once more. Ohio State House hosts a distraught lady worried that the vaccine turned her magnetic. The NYC Mayoral primary season is underway, using ranked choice voting for the first time. Interviews have revealed that the candidates are, for the most part, grossly out-of-touch concerning housing costs in Brooklyn. And Now: Someone Please Stop Stuart Varnet From Saying This ("Flattery is the mother's milk of television.") Main story (13m): As temperatures rise around the world, prisoners have to suffer extremely high temperatures, often in facilities that do not offer air conditioning, resulting in heat stroke and sometimes death, most frequently in Texas, but across the US as well. And Now: Ernie Anastos Left Fox 5 One Year Ago This Week, And We Miss His Man On The Street Segments More Than Ever. Finally, LWT offers a free commercial concept to any used car place that asks, under the condition that: they produce and air the piece, and that they must agree to use it sight-unseen.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: CODE NAME: DIAMOND HEAD
Re-rewatch! This episode is more popular than I suspected, partly on the strength, perhaps, of its short, A Day at the Fair. The movie itself is a spy-themed made-for-TV thing, made by Quinn Martin, originally intended as an NBC series pilot. The plot has to do with a couple of people trying to protect a deadly gas that can kill people on contact, which is indeed pretty deadly. It sounds impossible to work with. The host segments spotlight MST3K's least-considered regular character: Magic Voice. Previously and again.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: BLOODLUST!
Rewatch! In which we find out, for a hunter, the most thrilling prey of all is Mike Brady (Robert Reed). Also has the short Uncle Jim's Dairy Farm! Also, the first episode with Pearl Forrester, long before the became an official Mad! And the fiddle player in the square dance scene, off-screen, is reputed to be Maria Bamford! There, I think that's all the interesting points. Riff away. Previously.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Asian Americans
Another week in the void. We hear about two right-wing leaders and their failed COVID responses, that of UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson, and Brazil President Jair Bolsonaro, who let an offer by Pfizer of 70 million vaccine doses pass without response. And Now: People On TV Lose Their Shit Over The Phrase “Hot Vax Summer.” Main Story: The experiences of Asian Americans, often held up as a “model minority” by people who would like other minorities to see their problems as their own fault, when, to no surprise, the true story is a lot more complicated than tends to be recognized.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE CREEPING TERROR
Re-rewatch! Time to watch a carpet eat half a small town again! The great thing about this movie is nothing. The great thing about this episode is that the movie is so goofy and nonsensical that it's watchable on its own just to try to figure out whatever the hell is coming next. The riffs add onto that. This is unquestionably in the worst-of-the-worst pile, a bona-fide cinematic un-chievement. Previously and again.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: COLOSSUS AND THE HEADHUNTERS
Rewatch! No one named Colossus is in this movie, instead it has My Cheesesteak Maciste, beating people up as he is wont to do. One of the less popular pepla the MST crew did, perhaps because it doesn't have captive women or moon men in the title. This is the one with Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter, and the song regarding same. Previously.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Sponsored Content
This week once again comes to us from the White Void of Sad Facts. The Supreme Court is on track to review Roe vs. Wade, to the chagrin of practically every non-conservative. In Philadelphia, Larry Krasner, running in favor of police reform, won a primary for D.A. and is set to go against Republican Charles Peruto. Along those lines there is a brief recap of cartoon character candidates in the news, such as Andrew Giuliani. And Now: San Francisco City Council Meetings' Public Comments Are A Joy To Behold. The main story: sponsored content (21 minutes), specifically in local news programs, revenue source for local stations that, due to vague FCC rules that suffer from lax enforcement, often is insufficiently identified as paid programming. Many examples are given, including three that Last Week Tonight produced themselves and got placed for a mere few thousand dollars, for the "Venus Veil," a fake product that is the "world's first sexual wellness blanket."
Journey to EAT
Youtube show Adam Walks Around has Adam traipsing around places like the Phillippines, Indonesia, Malasya and Cambodia, and California, but nothing will prepare you for the end of Season 4, where our hero visits as many Californian locations of Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes as he can. It has disturbingly appropriate music and a lot of special appearances from actors, musicians, and relatives, the State Historian of New Mexico, Gumby and Pokey (or maybe impersonators), and a certain "J. Elvis." Locations include Bronson Cave, Griffith Park, Coleman Francis Mountain, and the former locations of The Haunted House, Club Scum, and, of course, the diner known only as... EAT.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: ZOMBIE NIGHTMARE
Re-rewatch! A relatively recent movie, but extra disjointed, with no less than two unexplained prologues before the real story. Ultimately a Magic Lady brings a buff young man back to life to avenge his death and bring justice to a crooked cop played by Adam West. It does contain "Ace of Spades" by Motorhead on its soundtrack, but it's also heavily edited for television. Previously and again.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Stand Your Ground Laws
This week, once again from the void... . Local governments try different ways to incentivize getting vaccinated against COVID, from lottery money to free fast food. And Now: Ari Melber, Rap Genius, Will Just Not Fucking Stop. The conflict between Israel and Hamas terrorists escalates, a conflict that, despite the both-sides, tit-for-tat framing the news media uses for it, greatly harms innocent Palestinians more than Israelis. The main story concerns Stand Your Ground laws (19m), an unnecessary set of laws passed in 22 states that removes the "duty to retreat" from armed confrontations, sometimes with disastrous consequences.
Forget it Jake, it's Neopets
Neopets (which is 21 years old) is preparing for a comeback, with an animated show in the works. Polygon covers a thriving black market within the cutesy JPEG distribution system, in newly-made, but old-style, "unconverted" pets that management long claimed weren't possible, in an entertaining video story on the whole affair, and which also provides some background on the site's history.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE DEAD TALK BACK
Re-rewatch! It's the third time we've shown this manifestly absurd film, about a parapsychologist with a Kermit-the-Frog voice who assumes that he has gravitas, and everyone else in the movie seems to believe it too. He lives in the basement of a boarding house with a collection of pseudo-supernatural trinkets, where he awaits the call of Law Enforcement when they need his, um, special talents. Sadly a lot of the movie is talking. Comes with a short, The Selling Wizard, in which a narrator and a mute pizza dominatrix jointly attempt to sell the audience on commercial freezer units. Previously and again.
It's movie sign, again, again
Mystery Science Theater 3000 lives once more! The show has been revived five times now: for Comedy Central (from KTMA), the Sci-Fi Channel (long before it was Syfy), for Netflix, as a series of live shows that technically (because of COVID) haven't even ended yet, and now, as the result of a second Kickstarter even more successful than their first, as a production for their own video site and apps, to be called The Gizmoplex. The first episode of the new season... GAMERA VS JIGER.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: INVASION U.S.A.
Rewatch! One of a long line of propagandist movies intended to rile up the public against the USSR. It's easy to get this one mixed up with Rocket Attack USA, made under a similar zeitgeist. That was a Joel episode with spies going to the USSR and failing to stop a missile attack against New York City, a lady spy seducing a Russian general for secrets, and a blind man walking during an immanent nuclear attack telling the camera, "Help me!" This is a Mike episode where a two-bit hypnotist zaps a bar full of people into experiencing a vivid hallucination of a Soviet military attack on their city. (Hypnosis was another overblown fear at the time, but didn't have as much of a concerted push to make people afraid of it.) With the short A Date With Your Family, starring Hugh Beaumont, it's a very fifties worldview on display. Previously.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: GIRLS TOWN
Re-rewatch! Unexpectedly popular for yet another black-and-white teen anger movie. This is the one with nuns. Also has Mamie Van Doren (still alive and on Twitter!), Paul Anka, Mel Torme and Dick Contino. In MST history, this is the first episode of Season Six, the one that introduced the Umbilicus, a space pipe that connects Deep 13 with the SOL. Previously and again. Notes on shows inside--
Mystery Science Theater 3000: 12 TO THE MOON
Rewatch! At least I think it is, this is one of those movies it's easy to forget exists for some reason. This is another of those movies where half of the time amounts to: "Gee whiz! Space!" There's a lot of preparing and rocketry and interviews with intrepid scientists and getting ready to let's all go to space. With cats. Then we get to space and meet aliens. Who want our cats. The short, however, is Design for Dreaming, and it's terrific, just completely crazy, bonkers, nutso, a highlight of the show's entire run. Previously.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Personal Bankruptcy
This week, again from the White Void of Sad Facts: the killings by police of Daunte Wright and Adam Toledo, kicking off yet another cycle of media condemnation, right-wing defense of police, and criticism of righteous anger from protestors. To attempt to change their part in this terrible cycle, LWT did short pieces on blissfully stupid topics (see inside). And Now: The Commercials On FOX News In The Middle Of The Night Know Exactly Who They're Talking To. Main story (21m): Personal bankruptcy, a resource employed by millions of people, and has been often unduly stigmatized.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS
Rewatch! Little Ronnie Howard invents a growth "goo" that the angry teens in town get into and cause problems. The last Bert I. Gordon movie MST would cover (as of pre-Season 13). Previously.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Long-Term Care
Prince Philip died. Matt Gaetz continues to face accusations of pedophilia and sex trafficking. President Biden promised to reverse Trump's refugee cap, but hasn't yet, and no one seems to know why. And Now: A Farewell Tribute to the Greatest Questions Ever Asked on Yahoo! Answers. Main story (23m): Nursing homes and assisted-living facilities in the US, and the serious problems that many of they have. And Now: A Few More of the Greatest Questions Ever Asked on Yahoo! Answers.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: TEEN-AGE CRIME WAVE
Rewatch! This one's kind of a sleeper. Some teens break out of jail (where teens come from) and menace a farm family. Teens only get more dangerous with age, folks, and these are at least 30. Previously
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: The US National Debt
Another week from the White Void of Sad Facts. Right wing media loses their shit at a suggestive music video featuring Lil Nas X. Matt Gaetz is suspected of violating sex trafficing laws. A historic vote of whether to unionize has taken place among workers at an Amazon fulfillment center, which Amazon has fought in ludicrous ways, including anti-union propaganda in bathrooms. And Now: Some Very Unwelcome News Regarding Peeps. (It's the Peeps & Pepsi promotion.) Main story (22m): the US National Debt, and the massive disingenuousness with which it has been portrayed by Republicans. A lot of interesting information in this one!
Mystery Science Theater 3000: RADAR SECRET SERVICE
Rewatch! The new space-age miracle science of RADAR will solve all problems, including that of catching criminals. The movie is a drag, but riffing on the short, Last Clear Chance, about a policeman who ominously shows up at a family home to issue dire warnings about traffic safety around railroad tracks, is terrific. Previously.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: OUTLAW
Re-rewatch! Gor is a desert planet where few people wear much clothes, and our hero Tarl Cabot ("Cabot? Cabot!") travels there from Earth via mystic jewelry, although he doesn't encounter their famous houseplants. Watch our for Jack Palance crapping bigger than any of us. Verily it is a toobular boobular joy! Previously and again.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Plastic
This week from the White Void of Sad Facts--The shootings in Atlanta of eight people, six of them Asian women, and the terrible response from police authorities. And Now: Even During A Pandemic, Local News Cannot Be Trusted With St. Patrick's Day. Main story (22m): plastic. Think we live in a golden age of recycling plastic? Think again: less than 9% of plastic made gets recycled, and over half of all plastic ever produced was made since 2005. How did we get to this point, when plastic recycling has been promoted for decades?
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Tucker Carlson
The passing of the Coronavirus stimulus bill was met with a weird celebratory tweet from the DNC, but Republican responses ranging from anger and dismay to people who voted no trying to take credit for it. And Now: Local News Bothers 100-Year-Old Women On Their Birthdays. Main story (25m): Tucker Carlson, his career, and how he gives white supremacist talking points a veneer of respectability. And Now: A Look Back At One Year Of TV News With Pandemic Precautions.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: THE ATOMIC BRAIN
Rewatch! An old rich lady decides to use her considerable resources, including her own mad scientist and a nuclear reactor in her basement (wow, really?), to have her brain swapped into the body of one of three younger women. The eventual result? Let's just say she better hope she can develop a taste for Meow Mix. Previously.
Sorry, Elvis's birthplace!
(looks to the left) (looks to the right) (takes a deep breath)
"MEMPHIS!"🚫🚫🚫BANNED BY TWITTER🚫🚫🚫
Gizmodo, The Guardian, The Independent, Engadget, WREG out of... you know, that town.
"MEMPHIS!"🚫🚫🚫BANNED BY TWITTER🚫🚫🚫
Gizmodo, The Guardian, The Independent, Engadget, WREG out of... you know, that town.
Mystery Science Theater 3000: BEGINNING OF THE END
Rewatch! On of the more entertaining of the episodes featuring the 50s monster attack genre of movie. Huge grasshoppers attack (a postcard of) Chicago while the army is helpless against the giant insect menace. Directed by Bert I. Gordon, Mr. BIG himself. Previously.
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Unemployment
This week from the white void: The Democrats pass the COVID relief bill, although a few (like Manchin and Sinema) prevented it from containing a minimum wage increase. The FBI identifies Trump-supporting white supremacist groups like the Proud Boys as the ones who stormed the Capitol building. And Now: Neil Cavuto Really Loves Adele. Main story (21m): Unemployment in the US, and how terribly it serves people in need. And Now: Rachel Ray's Complicated History With Baking.