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Anything in the aster family (which this definitely is, but that doesn’t mean it’s “an aster” per se) is notoriously difficult to identify, especially before it flowers! I would not trust an app to identify this at this stage. But have another look once the first of those buds opens, it’ll be easier then!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:26 PM on May 30, 2024

Could you clarify- you say this person has been hostile all week, but you only gave this one example of a pretty weird interaction. What else has happened with her to make you react so strongly to this?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:27 AM on May 23, 2024

Some birds will take herb leaves as a kind of insecticide for their nests. I’ve seen it with my own eyes in my garden, they just snip them right off. Maybe row covers would help?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:34 AM on May 9, 2024 marked best answer

If you ask him not to discuss details and he tries to do it anyway, he’s the one doing nonmonogamy wrong.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 2:25 PM on May 4, 2024

Ok so, I think this is one of those situations where from her perspective, she has been EXTREMELY clear in expressing that she has nothing but contempt for you and is deliberately parking in your space whenever possible because she thinks you don’t deserve a designated space more than she does.

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING THAT ‘CLEARING THE AIR’ WILL SOLVE. This woman has heard you loud and clear, this is not “a miscommunication,” she is just deliberately ignoring your demands.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:06 AM on May 4, 2024

What you are doing, when you bury a tomato seedling this way, is creating an artificially deep, strong root system for your genetically-manipulated-for-8000-years freak of a plant that would otherwise rip itself out of the ground from the sheer weight of its unnaturally massive and numerous fruits.

I love growing tomatoes.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 5:44 AM on May 1, 2024

The classic example of what you’re talking about is this story about cutting off the end of a roast, which you can find versions of all over the internet.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:46 AM on April 26, 2024

Seriously, google what bedbugs look like, I have rarely seen a bug that looked LESS like one.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 9:53 PM on April 12, 2024

“Neither Miller nor McQuiston write with the expectation that their stories are consumed entirely for women, but both TSoA and RWRB are extremely popular with women, sometimes more so than with actual gay men.”

…I’m pretty sure the “sometimes” there is, in actual fact, “almost always.” Romance novels about queer men are overwhelmingly written by and consumed by women. It’s kind of charming that this author appears unaware of this.
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:35 AM on April 10, 2024

I should maybe clarify that I (a queer woman who reads and writes this stuff) didn’t have a negative reaction to this at all, apart from finding it somewhat surprising. I think it’s great that he’s discovered this genre.

Also as a general note: despite some confident declarations in this thread, there is no one single reason women read m/m, and many people get things out of it that are diametrically opposed to what other people get out of it. I’ve had many discussions… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:19 PM on April 10, 2024

Anyone, please recommend interesting writing about M/M romance! I would love to read some feminist critique that helped me better understand the books I'm enjoying and what they are saying.

Pornography by Women For Women, With Love is a 1985 essay by lesbian sci-fi writer Joanna Russ about the thriving Kirk/Spock slash community of the time. It's absolutely fascinating.
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 11:08 AM on April 11, 2024

Is it a terrible idea to ask him if, when I did something wrong/off, that he would tell me that?

You yourself describe this person as DELUSIONAL. What value does the opinion of a delusional person have to you?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:13 PM on April 10, 2024

It sounds like you need to stop splitting household chores evenly. I’m completely serious.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 5:10 AM on April 10, 2024

Ooo yeah this is a challenging one. If it was me, I think I’d try winding thin wire or some kind of floss around the edges of the ends, kind of like how you’d finish a buttonhole, and then thread through more wire or floss to form an attachment point. This may not achieve the look you’re going for, but it seems like the best way to make the edges comfortable to wear without compromising the shape.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 11:18 AM on April 9, 2024

Gonna Be An Engineer by Peggy Seeger
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:20 AM on April 6, 2024

This sounds like a LOT of dates for four months, and it reminds me of myself in my early 20s, when I figured “this is a numbers game, I NEED to be going on 2-3 dates with different people every week until it hits.” But that was a miserable process that did not yield any lasting results and made me feel like crap.

Honestly I would recommend spending a few months being EXTREMELY fucking picky with who you go out with. It sounds like you’re in a place of “I am less… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:11 AM on April 5, 2024

Oh man I missed that you’re only on OKCupid…

Ok here’s the thing, I’m in my late 30s in NYC and the ONLY people I know who still use OKCupid are exclusively using it to look for poly sex partners. And even my poly friends prefer Feeld now. The general perception among my peers is that OKC is a wasteland. You really should try some of the newer apps.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:17 AM on April 5, 2024

What is it that the kid and therapist aren’t agreeing on? Or do you just mean “doesn’t agree with her” as in “she doesn’t like her in general”?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 5:25 AM on April 4, 2024

Uh, I can’t tell what the question actually DOES mean, but I guarantee it doesn’t mean “my kid wants a homophobic therapist”
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:35 AM on April 4, 2024

This information only makes it more baffling to me that they attributed the obvious photo editing to Kate herself once it was pointed out. Why do that? It’s just such a strange choice, out of all the possible responses.
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 10:32 AM on March 23, 2024

I recently attended an event wearing a fanny pack the “correct” way and was teased for NOT wearing it across my chest. This is now simply How Those Bags Are Worn.NYC, in my 30s.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:16 AM on March 21, 2024

It’s such a BAD photoshop, is what gets me. Nefarious reasons or not, can’t they afford a damn professional?
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:58 PM on March 11, 2024

Absolutely zero percent of my sudden interest in this whole affair has to do with thinking Kate doesn’t deserve privacy. It’s not about her at all, it’s about the stunningly incoherent palace PR response. It’s about the fact that they didn’t just say “she deserves privacy” and instead have been clearly and blatantly dishonest about her condition to the point where it’s created a massive own-goal. That photo they released is the kind of thing you see in a true crime… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 5:50 AM on March 12, 2024

Everyone is talking about Kate because the British press is misogynist. Charles is dying of cancer that his royal homeopath is not going to cure and yet it's Kate that the media is obsessing and demanding proof of life over. The King, the actual monarch, gets privacy from the press. But his daughter-in-law, someone who is not part of the line of succession, has surgery and needs to recover and it's suddenly a conspiracy.

To me this is not an accurate… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:37 AM on March 12, 2024

It's not that it just hasn't occurred to people who have been following this story closely that she probably just doesn't look great after having surgery, they know that. It's everything else about it that seems out of character and strange.

Yes, thank you for saying this! We’re talking about a family whose entire public strategy has been laser-focused on maintaining a certain level of privacy and polished artifice for generations. It’s not some… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 7:37 AM on March 12, 2024

I don’t think it’s necessary to speculate about the expressions in the photo when the photo is clearly manipulated anyway, tbh (and it 100% is, if anyone’s still skeptical about that - I have merely kinda-skilled-amateur photoshop skills and a moment’s glance makes it obvious.)
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:19 PM on March 12, 2024

Broadly, I think it’s missing the point to say stuff like “Kate deserves time to rest and recover without being photographed” because that’s not actually what this whole scandal/mystery/whatever is about. It really has nothing to do with Kate as an individual at all. It’s the fact that they are treating whatever’s going on with her as an absolute secret in notable contrast to the way they have handled previous medical events in the royal family. This has made people… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:30 PM on March 12, 2024

I wouldn't read too much into bricks. There's plenty of other oddness going on.

Yes, there’s plenty of very obvious evidence that This Is Weird without that and without stuff like “is that a tassel or a heel on the girl’s shoe” or whatever. It’s worth pointing out that the very comprehensive Neiman Lab article came out BEFORE the first photo was sent to the wire services, and it does a very good job of showing why this blew up - it’s because the… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 1:40 PM on March 14, 2024

Lol Don Pepino I legitimately can’t tell which parts of that are sarcasm. No shade either way.

In all seriousness, I have been asking myself why I DO care about this, as a person with no history of interest in the royal family or in celebrity gossip in general.

I think there are a lot of factors really. There’s the general atmosphere of resenting the rich and powerful and the way they feel entitled to set a narrative and expect us not to question… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 10:03 AM on March 16, 2024

Absolutely not, because the LONG-term value of stocks is not a thing rich people appear to care about anymore.
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 6:31 AM on March 12, 2024

This is a very small and specific answer: I used to feel very insecure about my tastes in media things, and would let other people’s opinions totally sway my own. I got over this by accident, because I started reading a lot of vintage sci-fi that nobody I knew had ever heard of, and that I had no preconceived opinions about. I started keeping little notes about which authors I especially liked or disliked, and after a while I realized that not only did I have these opinions, I felt very… [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 9:28 AM on March 1, 2024

I would slice a bunch up and put them in a jar of white vinegar in the fridge. They’ll keep for a long time and are a great topping for practically every cuisine on your list.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:22 AM on February 26, 2024

Honestly I wouldn’t consider the physical separation thing to be An Absolute Necessity, it’s what you do IF the cats are physically fighting or massively stressing each other out, but it’s not like the cats will explode if you just… get rid of the barrier and let them interact or not as they will.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:21 AM on February 25, 2024 marked best answer

Guess who isn’t experiencing any consequences at all for the incredible proliferation of illegal weed shops? LANDLORDS.

I am a huge supporter of legal weed. But now on my three block walk home from the subway, I see ten weed stores, all unlicensed. One of them used to be the only produce store on my block. And I don’t blame the new store for the fact that the old store vanished - I blame the landlord, who will suffer zero consequences because this city is run by… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 7:17 AM on February 25, 2024

Honestly, the kind of consulting you’re describing sounds like the places that recruited business students straight out of my undergrad. That kind of place does not actually CARE about the quality of the product they deliver, they care about making more more more more money and your proposed solutions would cost money. Go work for someplace that isn’t “consulting” and actually makes things themselves.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 8:44 AM on February 18, 2024

You can freeze wine to cook with! It turns slushy, not solid, so no need to defrost, just scoop what you need.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:27 PM on February 16, 2024

It was rude of them not to give more information about why they had to step away. It was ALSO rude for you to blow them off with no explanation. It’s not like there’s some sort of universal karma scorekeeping where you get to be a dick to a person because they were a dick to you. I mean, you CAN do that, but don’t pretend it has anything to do with justice. It’s just ego.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 7:14 AM on February 15, 2024

I’ve been in meetings both for work and clubs that had a portion structured around each person getting x time to give updates or feedback (like 2-3 minutes) with zero interruption allowed. Depending on the nature of the meeting it can be very useful.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 2:59 PM on February 14, 2024

Would you describe this person as an excellent judge of character? Do you have any reason to think they have unique and special insight into your personality that you don’t possess? No. This person is simply a fucking asshole, and their “judgements” of “you” are neither actual judgements nor do they have anything to do with you as a person. Stop looking for meaning in their comments and try to process it as meaningless chimp noises, which is essentially what they are.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 10:16 AM on February 14, 2024

Blendoku 2 is basically the only app game I play, happy to see it has a Good rating!
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 3:03 PM on February 5, 2024

I WOULD describe myself as a big fan of certain things, much more than you seem to, and I still think what you’re describing as “normal” is actually pretty extreme.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 3:27 PM on February 2, 2024

Try it with a yogurt drink or bottled smoothie. I am AWFUL at taking pills and this almost completely eliminates the problem.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 3:21 PM on February 2, 2024

Look up the brand Tomboy X. They are more aimed at queer people but they may be exactly your style.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 9:29 AM on January 30, 2024 marked best answer

I have reviewed resumes and cover letters at three different workplaces, and none of them used these tools. This may be standard practice at massive corporations, but even then, there is no reasons to cram buzzwords into a cover letter because the whole point of a cover letter is to supplement and personalize your resume.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 10:15 AM on January 27, 2024

This is like if you got hit by a car and walked away with no injuries, and then kept trying to convince yourself that you MUST have a broken bone you’re just ignoring because people who get hit by cars have broken bones.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 10:32 AM on January 26, 2024

I’m interested in this idea, but every time I’ve tried to just Sit Down And Write without an idea in my head for what to write about, I produce nothing but useless rumination. Can you say whether that’s something this book specifically addresses? I have found other ways to produce work I’m happy with, but not on any kind of regular basis.
posted to FanFare by showbiz_liz at 9:27 AM on January 25, 2024

I read most of this article with my jaw hanging open. If these guys are right, then it changes practically everything we thought we knew about biology.
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 3:00 PM on January 18, 2024

A little bit of woo goes a long way towards reminding the otherwise-rational not to be myopic, dismissive, and incurious.

Yeah, perhaps I simply framed this post poorly, but when I read an article about a guy who electrically induced an eyeball to grow where no eyeballs ought to grow just by zapping it with electrical signals that matched the signals in eyes… I mean how can anyone not think that’s the coolest shit they ever heard? Or transferring the… [more]
posted to MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 5:26 AM on January 19, 2024

I had lens replacement surgery (basically the same as cataract surgery) and it's been a success.

My dad had this done when his cataracts were removed and was able to see without glasses for the first time since he was a child. I don’t know how easy it is to get this done if you’re not already having cataract surgery but it might be worth investigating!
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 4:47 PM on January 16, 2024

My mom is just beginning to explore this in similar circumstances and really recommends the DatingOver60 subreddit.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by showbiz_liz at 3:18 PM on January 16, 2024